Hi blog family!
a lot is on my heart today as I was told I have to have surgery ASAP to see what two black spots/growths are! Yes, I was scared when my doctor said the "C" word - I will not speak it, as it has killed many of our friends family and colleagues! No matter how healthy you try to be by eating and exercising- the C can still pop up out of no where!
As many of you know I had been living in an apartment over 18 years and got sick from the deadly mold! But when I think about it, I am nothing special so I am subject to environmental illness like anyone else!
I look at my friend recently who survived a double mastectomy! My other who went through prostate cancer, and my birth cousin recently succumbing to Cancer.. Ok, I said the word! It is everywhere but I refuse to let it or the possibility of it make me scared to live the life GOD intended for me!
My Curve ball life poem - This is nothing..
I decided that this is nothing for someone whose mother gave me away because of neglect
This is nothing compared to the many times I sat with my siblings so hungry, my stomach still growls!
This is nothing worse than when I found out my two foster brothers were monsters and sexually abused me for years, and then it was covered up, as if I was a hot 9 year old!
This "C" ain't nothing compared to thinking that I had love in my life, (my baby brother that stayed with me all my foster life), and then he died of heart disease on me at 41 !!
This is minor compared to when I was attacked randomly outside of NYU dorms over 25 years ago, before the central park jogger), luckily they could not get my belt off and thanks to my boyfriend at the time lending me that military belt, it saved my life, I was beaten for dead, in a coma, lost two nerves and a tenant in my hand BUT again, this was nothing....
This isn't nothing ...when I look back on when I faced homelessness after this incident, (could not model anymore with a cast on hand that had to be held up for almost a year!) .. not once but twice because I refused to go back to a home that held my abusers-
this is nothing for me to fight, as I have the most wonderful two girls in the world, (lol besides yours for all the moms)
This is nothing to fight for me, a former victim who has a voice, choice and a lot of work to do for foster kids!
Pray for me, pray for each other. Fosters AND adoptees must stand together, as you never know what life will bring in the form of a curve ball BUT if you have support - you can get through anything! I know because I am still here after the storms of life has hit me, (like you ), with MANY curve balls! Know that you have purpose and ALWAYS, even at the last hour, keep FAITH - u cannot live without faith- u will only survive but our goal for 2014 is to LIVE to the fullest!
Save the date for March 28th FREE event! I will post flyer soon and if all goes well, I will be up and running before that!! xo
Tanya
a lot is on my heart today as I was told I have to have surgery ASAP to see what two black spots/growths are! Yes, I was scared when my doctor said the "C" word - I will not speak it, as it has killed many of our friends family and colleagues! No matter how healthy you try to be by eating and exercising- the C can still pop up out of no where!
As many of you know I had been living in an apartment over 18 years and got sick from the deadly mold! But when I think about it, I am nothing special so I am subject to environmental illness like anyone else!
I look at my friend recently who survived a double mastectomy! My other who went through prostate cancer, and my birth cousin recently succumbing to Cancer.. Ok, I said the word! It is everywhere but I refuse to let it or the possibility of it make me scared to live the life GOD intended for me!
My Curve ball life poem - This is nothing..
I decided that this is nothing for someone whose mother gave me away because of neglect
This is nothing compared to the many times I sat with my siblings so hungry, my stomach still growls!
This is nothing worse than when I found out my two foster brothers were monsters and sexually abused me for years, and then it was covered up, as if I was a hot 9 year old!
This "C" ain't nothing compared to thinking that I had love in my life, (my baby brother that stayed with me all my foster life), and then he died of heart disease on me at 41 !!
This is minor compared to when I was attacked randomly outside of NYU dorms over 25 years ago, before the central park jogger), luckily they could not get my belt off and thanks to my boyfriend at the time lending me that military belt, it saved my life, I was beaten for dead, in a coma, lost two nerves and a tenant in my hand BUT again, this was nothing....
This isn't nothing ...when I look back on when I faced homelessness after this incident, (could not model anymore with a cast on hand that had to be held up for almost a year!) .. not once but twice because I refused to go back to a home that held my abusers-
this is nothing for me to fight, as I have the most wonderful two girls in the world, (lol besides yours for all the moms)
This is nothing to fight for me, a former victim who has a voice, choice and a lot of work to do for foster kids!
Pray for me, pray for each other. Fosters AND adoptees must stand together, as you never know what life will bring in the form of a curve ball BUT if you have support - you can get through anything! I know because I am still here after the storms of life has hit me, (like you ), with MANY curve balls! Know that you have purpose and ALWAYS, even at the last hour, keep FAITH - u cannot live without faith- u will only survive but our goal for 2014 is to LIVE to the fullest!
Save the date for March 28th FREE event! I will post flyer soon and if all goes well, I will be up and running before that!! xo
Tanya
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